Memphis....well what can I say...

Well this place is something different...not sure where to start! Firstly I got here at 22.30 on Halloween and decided that as I was only here 3 nights I should go out for a few beers so I went for a wander down to Beale Street (which is one of the most famous streets for music and the blues in the whole country). BB King has a bar there and almost every single bar has a live blues or soul band....also, every single bar has a 'kitchen open till late'! You can not get away from food here!

So anyway, I walk out of the hotel and everyone except for me is wearing some kind of Halloween costume and they are all wishing everyone they walk pas "a Happy Halloween y'all"...so immediately I felt underdressed. Next thing I know, I'm walking behind what I thought was a young person dressed as Father Christmas (Sorry, I mean Santa) only to find out that he was about 70 and wearing a real beard, walking along on his own..... I actually think he may have been the real Santa annd maybe he thought it was his one chance of the year to go out for a walk without anyone asking questions or mobbing him...who knows!
So I end up in a bar called 'the flying saucer' which has a big pool table and a huge bar and the place is covered in saucers (plates) with peoples names on them...I never asked why but guess its some theme thing... The only thing I could think of doing was asking for a "bottle of beer please" just like Colin does in Love Actually when he gets mobbed by three birds in the States cos oif his English accent....unfortunatley the barmaid just asked me what beer I wanted as they sold every beer under the sun, so I ended up with a Coors Lite! I moved on to another bar (the blues cafe) ended the night with a half rack of ribs, chips (fries), some 'slaw and beans! I literally asked the barman for a snack and he recommended that! Seriously you can not eat healthy in Memphis if you tried! No wander they are all fat! It;s as if there is a law prohibiting anyone from living over the age of 50! For example.....I went to Sun Studios yesterday and then wanted to get some lunch after so I wandered into this burger bar come pub (that looked like the interior of 'Cheers') and it's known as the best burger in the whole of memphis so felt I had to go there once. I sat down and ordered a cheeseburger but with a side salad (I've got to at least try and eat something healthy!) and even the salad came with this dressing which probably took all the goodness out of the salad! When the burger turned up the onion rings that came with it were bigger than the actual burger (I'm not joking)...it's ridiculous!

Whilst on the subject of yesterday.....whilst on the walk back down Union Avenue from Sun Studio's (it's about 3/4 mile from my hotel) I noticed two black fella's walking toward me and they were talking pretty loudly to each other. I was trying to be typically English and keep myself to myself and out of nowhere one of 'em put's his hand in the air, say's "what's up Bro" and High five's me! Then he just walked on....?? It happened to me again with another fella that afternoon who decided he wanted to be my friend!

Oh yeah, back to food.....
I tried to order a semi healthy breakfast this morning and ordered an omelette and a 'fruit pot' on the side....for which I was given the option of having cottage cheese on top of the fruit!!!!! WTF!!?? I declined (obviously)...when the omelette turned up it had a huge portion of fried potatoes on the side! They are out to get me I know it!

I went to Graceland this morning and had tickets booked for 10.30 so I got a cab and the driver...again, a black chap, who sounded like Barry White and was the same size was talking on his mobile to his mate about how he hadn't had a decent tip all morning......clearly a ploy to make me feel like I had to tip him! He got what he wanted and then insisted I take his number if I wanted a cab back after I left...must have been the $10 dollar tip I gave him by mistake! All the dough looks the same over here!

Graceland was quality and the grounds are huge but the house is not massive...it's big enough but more like a house than a mansion....I took loads of pictures so will try and add them on here at some point....I felt emotional at old Elv's grave (I'll be honest) and I looked like a proper tourist with my headset on listening to the recorded tour....I nearly had a rush of blood to the head and bought a replica jumpsuit but was put off by the $2,100 price tag! Lots of English and Australians there also. After I had wandered through Elvis' airplane 'The Lisa-Marie' and had taken about 500 pictures of Graceland from every angle possible I remembered that Jane had requested I "eat a banana and peanut butter sandwich whilst singing old shep" whilst I was in Memphis so thought what better place to do it than at the Elvis diner opposite Graceland. I walked in and ordered it and sat down at a booth (it was a 1950's style diner as you'd expect) and I made sure no one could hear me and I took a bite and sang the only words I know from that song (I promise you I did it Jane)... please, no more requests!

I left the diner and decided I couldn't be bothered to ring my new cab driver friend, Coco (yes swear that was his name, I am not kidding...he even wrote it on the card he gave me...brilliant!) so I jumped in the first cab at the taxi rank....another black fella but this time I could not understand a word he was saying! He sounded exactly like the barber at the barbershop in Coming to America and he kept going on about all the cars that were getting too close to his in the rain (or at least I think that's what he said!) ...I just agreed with him on everything (reminded me of when I first met Sweaty actually!). Anyway, I'm now back at the hotel and gonna have a few beers tonight as it's my last night in Memphis as off to San Francisco tomorrow afternoon so I will update on you on that soon as I get a chance.

One last thing.......I've found myself using American slang and phrases purely because they can't understand anything else...... been using the phrase 'sidewalk' and 'cool man' quite a bit although I have been doing the very English thing of holding open doors and saying 'please and thankyou' after everything (Mum, I hope you're pleased?)

Anyway, I'll be back with more updates shortly!